Lindsey Graham arrested while tossing Georgia ballots into ocean

(Satire at its best)...

Senator Lindsey Graham, (R, SC), was arrested yesterday along a Savannah, Georgia pier while allegedly throwing legal ballots into the Atlantic Ocean. The ballots, which were primarily from Democratic districts in Atlanta and Savannah, were  packed in white U.S. Mail packing boxes with labels addressed to elections offices in Atlanta and Savannah. It was estimated that Graham had at least 70 boxes stacked along the pier, each box easily containing at least 300 marked ballots. 

Graham's Chevy Suburban, which was found about a hundred feet from the pier, was loaded with another 50 to 60 boxes of ballots. It is believed that they were early mail-in ballots that Graham and his cohorts in crime somehow had managed to attain early in the vote counting process.

Scuba team retrieval

A scuba team of Navy Seals, which ironically has just undergone document retrieval training in the high seas, has been deployed to retrieve the ballots and deliver them to the proper Elections Offices. 

Graham's Judiciary Committee Chairmanship

It is not known if or how Graham's arrest and likely conviction will affect his chairmanship of the Senate Judiciary Committee. However, it is unlikely that he will chair the confirmation hearing of the next Supreme Court Justice. Camera crews can't social distance in the Federal Penn!